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Hello~!
So here I am, returning to Blogger after 1.8 years. Wow, that's awfully long, right? Well, it doesn't matter, the most important thing is I'm back (like anyone cares) heol.
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I guess I'm back, with a more mature mind and soul. I'm 18 now, I've finished school already. Now, I'm waiting for the day to enter University. Haha, it's kinda funny 'cus I feel like the only one who's gonna enter University late. My friends are all going through that new "phrase" of life, while me here, still staying home; kpop and games.
To be very honest, I love this. I'm actually NOT ready to go to University yet. I mean, what is waiting there? Will I have friends? Heol, I'm a person who is bad at socializing but if that someone is good on getting along with me, then, well everything's fine, I guess. Huffff, yeah, I know. I sound so pathetic, ya? I dunno. Maybe I am. Ahh;; I don't even understand myself sighs;;
It feels so stressfull thinking about the uncertainties what lies ahead-; that you won't know what might be thrown at you. I'm curious too, but it's just urm, well its a matter in between that you're ready or not. My answer is? No.
Even myself, I feel a distamce already, the distance from my school friends. Well since they're busy also having new buddies so well. It's not like I care. Nope. Even once, cus I already knew from the very begining. They just say " I'll never forget you" and all that bullshit crap, but in the end, they do forget you. So, I'm not that culture shock or anyting cus I was already expecting that. It's always like that from the very begining. So if you guys see me like I'm having fun here with my life;; just think that I don't really freaking care anymore. Sounds so selfish and arrogant right? Get out, cus that's how life works. Why should you care about others when they don't even care about you? Common' rethink~ Tbvh, I don't really give a shit about others. I don't really like people. I like to do things alone, to be alone. I hate crowded places, I hate noisy places like clubs and places full of people. I like quite places where I can think freely and listen to music alone. I don't even write about my personal life on SNS like on twitter;; facebook;; and wechat. I don't usually reveal my personal life like others do on SNS. I don't feel like it; i don't feel safe. Cus no matter where I am, people will always look on me. They stalk me. Why? I don't even know. It feels like I don't have my own personal space. I don't get it. Seriously, am I an Idol or something? Well it feels like I'm not(?) Then, what's with the stalking? Especially on facebook, twitter, wechat and on instagram. I mean, omfg can i just post whatever I like without being judge? Oh please;;;;
Sometimes, I feel like going on an audition to start a career, but thinking deeply, maybe I should not;; maybe I should. I don't know. It's not too late yet. Maybe if I think clearly, I might go audition.... Well its still unplanned yet, I hope soon I might sort it out;; sigh~
Oh, btw, I got my driving licence already! Teheee~ Alhamdulilah, I aced it. I was kinda scared tho, but Allah has made it easy; so I passed it. Syukur. Hehe.
Also, you know before(if you read my last post) where I was crazy about Super Junior? Now... I don't know. I'm literally confused. It seems that I kinda set apart with them. It's not that I dislike them anymore; it's more like letting go 'ya know? They're growing older; I meant was they're in that certain age of having a personal life; for instance; getting married. The group's average pointer age is around 31.2 if I'm not mistaken. So, like I mentioned above they are in that certain circle who needs to have their own life. Cus, they won't be an idol forever, they need someone to be with them too. So, I decided to let them go. I do still love them, but not as a crazy fan anymore. I'm called a regular fan unlike last time. Those times were different, now is way complicated. Besides, I'm more into multifandom though so, yeah.
I even changed groups too. Now I'm into those hiphop raps and everything. I find the genre hiphop is intresting tho, thanks to BTS.
Yeah, BTS has caught my eye. They sorta captured my and pulled me with their charms. You guy know right, like in that every group you'll have that one and only bias you'll love right? But in BTS; its a whole different story. Cus you'll love them all hakhak. The rapper line RapMonster, Suga and JHope composed their own songs, and those tracks they made are all amazing. Really if you look at it, it's hard to create beautiful songs with wonderful melodies. Because of that, I respect them alot. They are also aren't that far apart away from me. RapMon and JHope are 94z and Suga is 93z so really at a young age they are able to compose songs. That's really rare, though. The song that really caught me was Cypher Pt2. Its a rap song, the lyrics are also intresting;; its not like that typical love songs, its about their life. I just love how they convey those songs and lyrics into a message about their story. Honestly, they're the first hiphop group who has great rapping styles and such intresting lyrics to read. I'm truly amazed cus usually I don't read lyrics but they really slapped me hard on the cheeck. Daayuuummmm~~ But despite that; All of them are special, but the most special one who caught me by heart was Kim Seok Jin (Jin). I don't even know how did I fell for him BUT seeing him as an awkward hyung, an underrated guy(cus I guess he's a bit shy and timid to be on camera) and the way he cooks(yeah, he cooks and even makes his own recipes) really stole my heart. Haha. Well, I'll continue my story about BTS on my next post I guess and yeah! I even met them already. Had eye-contact and talked to them! See, I feel kinda lucky. Ah thanks God. Oh, I get to met them cus I won the Hello Session pass. This event is included for their The Red Bullet Tour that was held on 6.6.15. Yeah, I went to the concert and had the greatest time of my life.
Well then, I guess I'll write my experiences about those two days on my next post! Till then; do anticipate it~~~~~
Oh oh, if you guys are wondering who is this Kim SeokJin guy, well here he is! (he's hawwwwwt right?
:p)
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Also, if ya all are wondering who is this BTS; here! This is my new hiphop group; BTS!
v, Jimin, Jungkook, Suga, Jin, J-Hope and Rap Monster. These people are amazing. Really. I look up to them so much.
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Well, I'm gonna elaborate about them in the next post; do wait patiently yah! Haha, I might post a bit late as I'm gonna re-edit my blog once again to freshen it up. Well, till then~~~ see ya~~~
MY PRINCE.
NEW PHONE.
